This post was meant to be on 27th Jan 2009 :

Sharminie aka Loose

Many more happy returns of the special day of YOURS!

You and me have been friends since convent days back till now. Even though we went through cold rainy days in Max but TRUE friendship always survive together under any circumstances and i believe we did .

I can recall a lot of my FRIENDS come and go through my life like the seasons. You are not one of them and chose the road less travelled and stuck with me for all i can remember.

If ever my words or acts have caused any displeasure to YOU, i personally apologise for being so. You know me very well and i undoubtedly think you are so used to the temperamental me.

Girl fear not i will be with you when you need someone. I cant promise you anything else but my sincere thoughts and concern shall be by your side.

TRUST me i had so much of memories of us like;

How we shared our first piece of cheese cake

How we shared our last day in Convent Sentul

How we worked hard to organize the kolam comp

How we still can SMILE after screwing the bio paper (spm's last one)

How we managed to finish up the banner in less than 5hours

How we still can re-unite in convent after a year

How we can still pose and cam-whore tirelessly whenever we have the chance

How we loitered after school during L6

How i adored you in this costume(that song u danced to is still in my mind)

How we manage to endure hard times with a smile

AND how we still are FRIENDS!!!

Thanks for everything and I'm hoping to see you soon. May God bless you and grant all your wishes (PEACE)

i reacted to the poison ivy

i lost something very dear to my heart

and

i am truly guilty in my conscience!!!!!

Anyone can become angry that is easy,

But to be angry with the right person; to the right degree;

for the right purpose and in the right way,

is not easy.

-Aristotle-

sing me a lullaby.

Before anything else...Happie CNY (ox) Year to everyone out there! My mum was born in the Ox year so hopefully things will turn better for her and the rest of us. Today i managed to transfer credit from my mum and smiled cheekily at her when she demanded how she had less of it. ;p Sorry ma! Well then i texted all my chinese mates and i even had replies from Yeng Ping and Kim wishing me as well. Guys thats sweet, thanks=) lol..

Yesterday night, i got few missed calls from my close friend Thaya. LOoks like he's back for CNY holidays from his NS stint. I couldnt answer him since my headphone's plastic coating tore at the edge where you insert into the slot. Damn it! That spells no talking on the phone with anyone due to the fact that the speaker is already spoilt few months back. Now i have to just wait patiently to get some of the green bills and make a purchase sooner. Back to Thaya, i manage to text him hours ago and we both slept through halfway. By the time I'm up i realized i had 0.00cents. Oh so great! Sharmini i hope you understand my situation........don't you worry something is definitely there for you in the next post.

My cousin's son share the same birthday with Sharmini and they've been celebrating it ever since his first one in orphanages and welfare homes. I'm heading for one tomorrow nearby Klang. Eventually we had to get something for this adorable boy ( whom i gave a nick as Smelly for no valid reasons!); so mum decided we all should hit KLCC fo a movie and to get him a birthday gift which was a toy. He has been my close comfort to bullying and playing like there's nothing else which matters when he is around. Even when I'm very down yet seeing his lips curving into a smile or even when he starts sniggering at me is just completely breathtaking. My obsession for kids never ends!

Needless to say, KLCC was filled with all walks of people especially immigrants who have gotten their days off as well. Its hard to even walk our way through to the cinemas but yeah finally we did manage and thank god the queue was not as long as i had expected it to be. We got the tickets for Ink heart. The movie had a nice plot but nothing extraordinary..i would give thumbs up for the digital work as it was not unbelievable seeing creatures like Unicorn and the flying monkey. Well i did expect a more adventurous journey since Brendan Fraser was the lead actor but never mind for the one and half an hour movie.

Then we headed to TOYSrUS and got him a battery operated train and i had to throw my cash since mum paid for the movie and etc. Finally i managed to satisfy one of my cravings today; Chocolate Shake and Twister fries from Mcd. That duo spells calories but who cares when a girl is PMS-ing! We headed back home after witnessing the special Lion Dance show from the fifth floor after digesting myself at Kinokuniya gazing at the treasures.

Adios! I swear I've got some serious posts coming SOON.

PS: If i were a SILVERTONGUE; i would write a book just for US and READ IT ALOUD!

i do wonder why still.

From the movie Dil Chata Hai, i came to like this song when i was going through a bunch of Hindi songs in this site http://www.downloadhindisongs.blogspot.com/. Little did i know, that the female part was sung by Alka Yagnik; one of my favourite playback singer besides Shreya Goshal. Lucky me i wanted to sing along with it and tried to find the lyrics in Hindi but eventually found another site which offers both Hindi and the translated version (the meaning). Perhaps it was no coincidence since it was apt for the mood i'm currently in.Enjoy!

Jaane Kyon ?
Wonder why ?

(Male)

Jaane Kyon Log Pyaar Karte Hain
Wonder why people fall in love
Jaane Kyon Woh Kisi Pe Marte Hain
Wonder why they die for someone
Jaane Kyon Jaane Kyon ?
Wonder why , wonder why ?

Pyaar Mein Sochiye To Bas Gham Hai
Think about it , love has but sorrows,
Pyar Mein Jo Sitam Bhi Ho Kam Hai
In love every effort is never enough
Pyar Mein Sar Jookana Padta Hai
In love one has to bow one's head

Dard Mein Muskurana Padta Hai
In pain you have to smile
Zaher Kyon Zindagi Mein Bharte Hain ?
Why do they mix this poison in their lives ?

(Female)
Pyar Bin Jeene Mein Rakha Kya Hai
Without love what else is there in life ?
Pyar Jisko Nahin Woh Tanha Hai
The one who has no love is lonely
Pyar Sau Rang Le Ke Aata Hai
Love brings a hundred colors
Pyar Hi Zindagi Sajaata Hai
Love decorates life

Log Chup Chup Ke Pyaar Karte Hain
People in love meet furtively
Jaane Kyoun Saaf Kehte Darte Hai ?
Wonder why they are scared to say it outright ?
Jaane Kyon Jaane Kyon
Wonder why , wonder why ?

(Male)
Pyaar Bekaar Ki Musibat Hai
Love is a useless infliction

(Female)
Pyaar Har Tarah Khoobsurat Hai
Love is beautiful in every aspect

(Male)
Oh Pyaar Se Hum Door Hi Achche !
Oh from love we are better off staying far !

(Female)
Are Pyar Ke Sab Roop Hai Sachche
Dumbo , every form of love is true

(Male)
Oh Pyar Ke Ghaat Jo Utarte Hai
Oh , those who take the steps leading down to the river of love
Doobte Hai Na Woh Ubharte Hai
Neither do they sink , nor can they come out of it
Jaane Kyon Jaane Kyon
Wonder why , wonder why ?

(Female)
Pyar To Khair Sabhi Karte Hain
All fall in love
Jaane Kyon Aap Hi Mukarte Hain
Wonder why you are the only one who wont admit it ?
Jaane Kyon Jaane Kyon
Wonder why , wonder why.

countless emotions.

Yeah pretty much a lot of emotions racing in my mind at the very moment. I just cant seem to pick facts straight; maybe its time to start to twist things to my like? Nothing seems to be in my way and i cant look forward to such outcomes anymore just because i am:

• impecunious


• having many wantings which is actually necessary


• insomniac (couldn' sleep before its 7am)


• landing with unwanted arguments with my loved ones


• craving for super classified food which is beyond my affordability


• gasping myself for some quality TIME with my besties


• STILL jobless after all the effort i put to
  

Having all these in your life at one go can drive anyone pointlessly to some verge of breaking down. I am not so good in being an optimist but i think the only reason i still live by is because; i believe God has reasons for everything that's happening in our life (is that called optimism?) ; and i cant see myself for being a coward to fall into a sink hole without trying my best to come out of it. So yesterday, i decided that i shall start maneuvering my unwanted troubling thoughts by praying more than i ever did in my life.

My days seems to be less of sunshine but that doesn't mean the sun will not warm me from the blizzard I'm braving through!

piggy kartik's bday lar!

I wish u a happy birhday;

I wish u a happy birthday;

AND i wish u a very happy birthday;

For being twenty!

(sang in the tune of New Year song)

Dear Prince Vanilla,

Of course i am not your princess but don't you worry, I think you'll find Princess Vanilla at the United States of America since Mr.Obama has approved your visa application to study there. Well good luck with that!

As you know, we met by chance but stayed as friends by choice. You've been a great listener and sacrificied your ears to my deep unquestionble, unthinkable, inane thoughts and questions. I do not know until now how you manage to throw in your sympathy and sometimes your brains to think over whatever i share to you.

The wacko-ness in you can hit a stranger any time they get to know you!! For the first few chats i had with you through messenger (ermm sorry even now); i cant grasp your unique phrases which will never make sense to the sane ones.

Two years back, we had the same passion to do Actuarial Science but things didn't turn out the way we wanted. I hope you best suceed in whatever field you pursue AND guess what i'm stuck with a piggy guy-friend who is comical for life. Friends forever!!

For those who wish to be Princess Vanilla please notice the requirements needed below;

• loves vanilla flavour
• should be CUTE to his eyes
• knows how to dress up accodingly..temple means like a kudemba kutte valeke..then go shopping complez mean drrss up like tat wan
  
• crazy and wackooO (surpass his level would be even better)
• straight hair and should never be tied (even under the hot scorching sun)
• shy shy like mee(HIM)..but talkative....
• AND funny

So if you have what it takes please send your application with a latest picture to ice_spirit89@hotmail.com.

Kartik, please thank ME for my generous act!

Ps: i cherish this day a lot!! hope you make sometime again for US!

al these days...

MY LIFE has been going pretty mundane! Everyday since 1st January of this brand new year, i have been doing things super slow for no reason. Most of my mornings were spent sleeping and dreaming weird things and then followed by my wake up call (dearest mummy) ; she just got used to my attitude and adjusted herself towards my biological clock =D and rest of the day by watching TV and sneaking online late nights (like most of you have realised by now)

...What set today apart is i got to go to Sasti' Bday party at night! And let me tell you that my parents are very conservative and extremely protective of me. I have no complains about it but sometimes it does give me a headache thinking of the limited freedom i own in my life unlike my friends. Due to this, arguments do exist between my parents but as far i best understand they are doing what any other loving parents would do to make me safe and sound.

So yeah, i practically was lucky to get my super rider Li to fetch me, and the rest of the people who was fetched by him also includes Vicky,Chun Ho, Eliza and Kim. We were supposed to be at Sasti's by six but we never made it on time. First Li drove us all the way to Kepong since he didn't know the way to Selayang. It was heavy traffic all the way. By seven thirty we manage to reach Kepong and there all of us switched to Charlie's car since Eliza was late and Li and Kim will dash to get her.

Charlie was with her new hair-do brown blond streaks. She looked nice and a little more chubbier than i last saw her (giggles) We manage to reach Sasti's around 8.15 and was greeted by this huge Mongrel barking furiously at us. I had to bear the fact that it was only tied to a loose rusty chain on its neck. The boys were more scared then us and Sasti's mum had to distract HIM while we ran for our dear lives. LOL. Sasti was quite upset because we couldn't reach at the time we promised since her working colleagues are supposed to be there anytime as well.

Sasti was dressed in a wrap up dress black in colour and she looked pretty in it. We all said hi to her mum and conveyed our belated birthday wishes to Sasti. I got her a teddy bear out of rush and i knew that was not the gift she wanted. Sorry girl i blame it on someone else. Yeevon was already there waiting for more than an hour. Felt sorry to make her wait. She's now a part time teacher at SMK Menjalara and seems to be very excited about it. While waiting for Li and the duos, we hit ourselves with freshly baked chocolate cup cakes. It was yum! Next we chatted and Sasti' colleagues reached. They were all grown ups; so we pretty much isolated ourselves and went for dining. The food was alright and more over i was not hungry.

AND we quickly ran upstairs to her room to catch up things, laughed at ourselves and cam-whore! I think Charlie and Kim were the ones who started it! Voila everyone got int the mood of hyperness. Will post the pictures real soon. Around 9.30 we all got downstairs as the others went home. Sasti's dad offered us some liquor; well absolutely this is not my area of interest. I think almost everyone had it ; Gin. Kim by two shots was red in colour. We were doing our best to keep still. Almost eleven we left the place and Li dropped Chun, Vicky, El and me at last.

Overall, it was the first night i managed to stay out that late without my parents by my side! Some socialising of course was better than non and the night with his presence is a complete bliss.

MUET?..nevermind!

The trepidation in me was too much that i barely had a good night sleep. Rummaging through my handbag for my mobile ( since i left it there overnight) saw that it was quarter to ten and I'm still lying with doubt on my too cosy bed thinking of what is awaiting ahead me for the day. The past few weeks had been disasters which i cannot forget nor remember. It is all stuck between my neurons resulting me in not figuring out something, without always coming back towards unwanted thoughts.

Vicky coaxed me trying to put me into a state of mind into checking my MUET results via sms when the clock strikes twelve. It was not for better as his words were kept on running in my mind on whether to check it through sms or go ahead to school and get into the full drama on the go. By ten thirty, mum was like what did you get?..and im tossing and turning didn't know what was there for me. My first sms to Yeng Ping; wanting to know whether she has gotten the results and when she's gonna get the slip. Second goes to Vicky; replying to him saying i have not known mine yet. Third to Sasti; wanting to know if she is going to school or simply smsing to find out hers. Forth and the last; Lavennia; just texted her asking if she is going to school and when-she eventually offered me help to check for me with my id no. She brought the news to me but i was not excited JUST BECAUSE i believe that its best when you see it with your own eyes. AND tadadada i got a Band5...My mum was excited more than me.

Well vicky sounded very down and i managed to contact Li and he was quite down as well for not reaching the Band5. Perhaps, the adjudicators made a mistake?..I am certain these two people deserve at least a band5. Then, i called Laven up and she told me as far she have heard there were no b6 in my school (and later on confirmed by the teacher; Mr.Lau) Looks like for the first time in 2009, Lady Luck made a visit to my place. Thank you! And to those whom think they deserve better and feel they're not properly examined; i would say ENGLISH is a language and i believe no one can express their remarks on your proficiency level by simply examining YOU writing a one piece essay; hearing you talking with trepidation and sweaty palms; listening to muffled sounds and making up the rest of the words and understanding things you best understood by other mediums. Its a life long process and it will never come to an end unless you would want to. So my fellow peers continue loving ENGLISH in ways which suits you the best.

Ps; Mahesh you deserve a band5 too. (i read your message later in the night)

old tho still my friend..hapiie bday!!

bubbly me with the weird oh so look from NLK!

Happie Bday to this fellow buddy of mine whom i comfortably call as My Sweetheart ; Mr. Ng Li Kian whom has just turned TWENTY!..as for me im like not even half past 19teen (sobs). Li has been a great mentor to me and my fellow mates at Maxwell for the past a year and a half. Though we were not close at the beginning but somehow we manage to understand each other and generate ideas and thoughts with our daily conversations at school. I just love him for the fact that he's been generous about anything which he has and have profound amount of patience and tolerance! I find this incredibly awesome as many of my guy peers doesn't have this attitude (soorie guys) ...AND

For your knowledge this guy has been a very good athlete in terms of short distant running or what i consider a beautiful sprinter. He has been very well coached during his Form 4 and 5 and perhaps its innate for him to be one. +++ HE"S A IKNOWITALL and AMNOTSHOWIN"OFFguy+++ i say this bcoz he's got the brains as well and at times hav corrected our subject teachers who seems to be caught in a daze every single time we approach=P Besides this, my friend has a very friendly manner and i can speak to him about anything like an old friend. Its like i've enjoyed my company with him so many uncountable times and will treasure it a lot.

Hoping he would succeed in all terms of his life.........i dam miss YOU dear! God Bless=)

PS; i still have ur dedications+pictures+*Memories*

twilight..now why?

twilight...
Aha!! Say that word and you hear young girls gasps and go a-lil-cuckoO!! NOW WHY?? Basically this word stirred tweens and even those whom consider themselves teenagers (chuckles) a big deal! The author behind the book twilight has no doubt she's ever gonna get such an extremeeee feedback from her readers. LOOKS LIKE SHE'S GOT IT WRONG!..

Now why im bringing up this post as the starter of this blog is to exclude all sorts of linkage and popularity the word TWILIGHT brings. Very well, WHY again ?? I am very sure most of you have had the hard fact written in your hard drive that with the word twilight as it goes in my blog title 'the twilight seeker' ; i am a hardcore fan of the book, movie n etc.

Heck, you're wrong!! I must admit i have been a loser in year 2008 for missing out the movie but nevertheless the book i shall read SOON hopefully ;) So yeah i am not a fan of it YET..just not yet!! But hold on, perhaps many of you have never smelled the real deal of what twilight does actually mean..didn't ya?

Twilight according to the popular WIki :

Twilight is the time between dawn and sunrise, and the time between sunset and dusk.Sunlight scattered in the upper atmosphere illuminates the lower atmosphere, and the surface of the Earth is not completely lit or completely dark. The sun itself is not actually visible because it is below the horizon.

Due to the unusual, romantic quality of the ambient light at this time, twilight has long been popular with photographers and painters, who refer to it as the "blue hour", after the French expression l'heure bleue.


Read the wiki-entry again.

Its neither dawn nor sunrise; its neither sunset nor dusk! Its in the means of it...as for photographers to catch a twilight moment, its an incredibly hard task as you've got to have the patience and capture it at the right time. So people you get what it is Twilight actually??.. and the most important fact; Stephenie Meyer's twilight didn't inspire me to name this blog.

To me, twilight is something i look forward everyday; its a time to reminisce; to lay low and to be enjoyin' the ambiance. It is why i am the twilight seeker.